You're laying not even two feet away from me,
I'm upset.
You're most likely debating on what to do.
It's nothing serious. But I'm still upset.
You know I don't like her.
So what makes you think that I'll be all fine and dandy with you ditching me for her?
This time you are actually ditching me. Other times you hang out with her I don't care but
This time we already made plans, and You're changing them to go with her.
WHY does it have to be tomorrow?
I was really looking forward to showing you off to my friend.
You can just simply go shopping on Tuesday,
I guess she can go too, I'll hold my tongue.
I'm just upset and trying to hold back my tears.
I know it's a stupid thing to cry over but I'm a wimp when it comes to people I like.
Especially when it comes to going with another girl, ESPECIALLY one I don't like.
I don't know. You really can do what you want. I'll care but it doesn't matter to me
As long as you're content with your decision.
But I know you're not cause you know that I'm upset.
I just want to go over there and cuddle with you like we do every night. But instead I sit here typing and ranting about how I'm upset about you going to hang out with a friend.
Like I said, I'm only pissed cause we made plans first and you're changing them to hang with her.
Gawd I really wanna cry. It makes me feel better and takes away the urge to do it in the first place.
But I don't want you to feel worse. And you'd most likely get teary eye'd too and I don't wanna see that.
It wouldn't make anything any better.
So I'ma sit here and keep it bottled up, at least until you fall asleep and you can't hear my sniffles.
I think I'm mostly upset cause I always get upset every time I have to leave you. I like you being there by my side 24/7.
This is fucking stoopid.
I really, really, REALLY just want to cry. I hate the feeling that I want to cry, but can't.
I tried, but when you move I have to clear my face. I might just "go to the bathroom" and just sit on the toilet and cry there. That just sound pathetic.
I know you're not hurting me on purpose. Cause I see it hurts you when I'm hurt.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I get jealous
I'm sorry I make it difficult for you to make simple decisions.
I'm sorry I'm kinda a fuck up.
I could be just PMSing, But I'm just upset.
I'm fuckin stoopid and get upset over little things.
I really hope I don't fuck up things up.
You know what, you do what you like.
I'ma have to just grin and bare it.
I'm sorry & I Love You.
/rant
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Sweet Dreams
Oh Wifey,
I love you lots. But I'm not sure if it's LOVE.
I think I'm sure I'm not just quite in love with you yet. I am just in love with being around you. I'm rather content with that for now. I think my I'm keeping my guard up until school starts for you cause I'm not even sure what's going to happen when it does start.
Is this all gonna stop? I don't know what goes on in that crazy cute head of yours. It is possible you'll be like all the other guys I try to be with and say you're not "ready" for a "real relationship" or some crap. I hope/don't think that will happen.
I can never be to sure of how you actually feel about me. I'm too afraid to ask cause I'm worried about the answer. But by the way you just look at me and then just smirk ever so slightly makes my heart flutter.
Or when you surprise me with random kisses.
Or just laying next to you in bed and you just caress my face and stare into my eyes. It's simply amazing.
Oh Wifey,
I like how we don't get sick of each other at all. We don't ever like being apart. Those two days we had apart sucked soo bad for the both of us. We would try to fill the void by playing Runescape until 3 in the morning.
It's kinda a lame game, but you make it fun and I don't even mind unless I have some kind of communication with you. And you always seem so sad when I make you go to bed. The only reason I make you go to bed is so that we can hurry and wake up so we can see each other again. We've been together everyday for a while now. I've lost count but I don't care cause you're here in my bed right now and that's all that matters.
You know what I love though? Our Bff-Wifi. I love that we always think of the same things and we even say things at the same time. It happens way more than it should, but I don't mind. Except when we did it in front of your ex. I think you felt awkward about that. I just feel awkward being around her period.
Blah enough about her. I try and not bring her up at all when we're together.
Oh Wifey,
I just love being around you and don't like imaging anything without you. I actually wrote you a love letter and actually gave it to you. It was two pages about how long I've wanted to be with you and that you make me happy. When you read it, you just came to the kitchen and hugged me and just kissed me. I also read you my old journal entries about how bad I wanted to sex you haha. You thought it was cute. I think you're cute.
Cute doesn't really describe you. Attractive is the word I use for you. When I use the word attractive, I mean the person is attracting me with their looks and that I would do some things with them if you catch my drift.
And you sir, are VERY attractive to me. Sometimes I'll just stop and look at you and just admire your "beauty" and wonder how I got so lucky. I'm just beyond happy that you are finally mine.
So Wifey,
As I sit here next to sleeping you, glancing over at you every few mins, I just am so happy that I get to wake up to you every morning. And I always think if you feel that same.
I mean you have to by the way you caress my face in the morning and give me a morning kiss, morning breath and all.
So I shall end this entry so I can cuddle up next to you and fall into a deep sleep next to the one I heart.
Sweet Dreams♥
I love you lots. But I'm not sure if it's LOVE.
I think I'm sure I'm not just quite in love with you yet. I am just in love with being around you. I'm rather content with that for now. I think my I'm keeping my guard up until school starts for you cause I'm not even sure what's going to happen when it does start.
Is this all gonna stop? I don't know what goes on in that crazy cute head of yours. It is possible you'll be like all the other guys I try to be with and say you're not "ready" for a "real relationship" or some crap. I hope/don't think that will happen.
I can never be to sure of how you actually feel about me. I'm too afraid to ask cause I'm worried about the answer. But by the way you just look at me and then just smirk ever so slightly makes my heart flutter.
Or when you surprise me with random kisses.
Or just laying next to you in bed and you just caress my face and stare into my eyes. It's simply amazing.
Oh Wifey,
I like how we don't get sick of each other at all. We don't ever like being apart. Those two days we had apart sucked soo bad for the both of us. We would try to fill the void by playing Runescape until 3 in the morning.
It's kinda a lame game, but you make it fun and I don't even mind unless I have some kind of communication with you. And you always seem so sad when I make you go to bed. The only reason I make you go to bed is so that we can hurry and wake up so we can see each other again. We've been together everyday for a while now. I've lost count but I don't care cause you're here in my bed right now and that's all that matters.
You know what I love though? Our Bff-Wifi. I love that we always think of the same things and we even say things at the same time. It happens way more than it should, but I don't mind. Except when we did it in front of your ex. I think you felt awkward about that. I just feel awkward being around her period.
Blah enough about her. I try and not bring her up at all when we're together.
Oh Wifey,
I just love being around you and don't like imaging anything without you. I actually wrote you a love letter and actually gave it to you. It was two pages about how long I've wanted to be with you and that you make me happy. When you read it, you just came to the kitchen and hugged me and just kissed me. I also read you my old journal entries about how bad I wanted to sex you haha. You thought it was cute. I think you're cute.
Cute doesn't really describe you. Attractive is the word I use for you. When I use the word attractive, I mean the person is attracting me with their looks and that I would do some things with them if you catch my drift.
And you sir, are VERY attractive to me. Sometimes I'll just stop and look at you and just admire your "beauty" and wonder how I got so lucky. I'm just beyond happy that you are finally mine.
So Wifey,
As I sit here next to sleeping you, glancing over at you every few mins, I just am so happy that I get to wake up to you every morning. And I always think if you feel that same.
I mean you have to by the way you caress my face in the morning and give me a morning kiss, morning breath and all.
So I shall end this entry so I can cuddle up next to you and fall into a deep sleep next to the one I heart.
Sweet Dreams♥
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Misty Eye Good-Byes
I hate having to say good bye to you Wifey.
It really sucks.
Even before I even leave you, just the thought of leaving you
makes me miss you right then and there.
We don't even do anything all day.
Not a single thing except lay there and smoke. But I don't even care cause as long as I'm there with you while you have your arm around me holding me tight and kissing me, makes up for it.
I hate it.
I hate sleeping without you. My bed feels so empty and it's so quiet.
Just like my heart without you here.
When you're here, I'd just lay my head on your chest and slide my nails across your body
and just listen to you breathe and your heart race.
Saying Good-bye to you is more difficult then I have with anyone.
I actually have to fight back the tears, which is crazy cause I'm gonna see you tomorrow,
So why so sad?
Even with C. I never actually CRIED when I left him.
Maybe it's cause I have a waay different connection with you then I've had with anyone else.
A more closer, sexual, lovable level. And I love it.
I miss you Wifey already...
It sucks for now.
But soon I'll be back in your arms with your lips on mine.
I think I'm falling harder for you.
It really sucks.
Even before I even leave you, just the thought of leaving you
makes me miss you right then and there.
We don't even do anything all day.
Not a single thing except lay there and smoke. But I don't even care cause as long as I'm there with you while you have your arm around me holding me tight and kissing me, makes up for it.
I hate it.
I hate sleeping without you. My bed feels so empty and it's so quiet.
Just like my heart without you here.
When you're here, I'd just lay my head on your chest and slide my nails across your body
and just listen to you breathe and your heart race.
Saying Good-bye to you is more difficult then I have with anyone.
I actually have to fight back the tears, which is crazy cause I'm gonna see you tomorrow,
So why so sad?
Even with C. I never actually CRIED when I left him.
Maybe it's cause I have a waay different connection with you then I've had with anyone else.
A more closer, sexual, lovable level. And I love it.
I miss you Wifey already...
It sucks for now.
But soon I'll be back in your arms with your lips on mine.
I think I'm falling harder for you.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
My New Finally Love
These past two weeks and three days have made me the happiest.
I've spent all those days
and hours
and seconds with you D, my "Wifey" <3
It's just soo surreal to me.
All the kisses and touches and stares and love making
I feel like I'm in a dream and I'll have to wake up
at any moment.
I really hope I don't any time soon.
We've gotten soo much closer, beyond the amazing friendship we've had in the past
You we're one of my bestest friends. But it's funny cause I've liked you every since I first saw you
and talked to you that wonderful night on Stickam. But you were so hung up on your ex
I just admired you from afar in my heart, but still became the best of friends with you.
Small crush and all.
I remember back in the day, when you were with your ex and I was in love with someone else (although i still liked you) and we would call each other late at night, crying. Either you or me. Calling and crying about the people we were in love with but we found comfort in each other's voice and calmed each other down until the other passed out. I miss those days.
But those days don't even matter anymore, cause now, your mine and I am yours. And it's amazing cause YOU are the one that I've always been after. I've always had hope and never lost it. I mean I would forget about it, but it was always there because I would see you everyday and that very attractive face of yours.
I remember I was always jealous of your ex. I still kinda am and feel so awkward when we hang out with her.
I just sit there and think and wonder if you will ever love me as much as you loved her. I will always wonder that. No matter how long down the road. I try and not do anything or find anything that will remind you of her or bring her up. I just feel awkward when you talk about her. But just so you know, I won't hurt you like she did.
I'm just soo happy that I finally have you. See good things do come to those who wait. And I've waited for you for a long time. And I'm counting down the seconds until I get to kiss you again.
I've spent all those days
and hours
and seconds with you D, my "Wifey" <3
It's just soo surreal to me.
All the kisses and touches and stares and love making
I feel like I'm in a dream and I'll have to wake up
at any moment.
I really hope I don't any time soon.
We've gotten soo much closer, beyond the amazing friendship we've had in the past
You we're one of my bestest friends. But it's funny cause I've liked you every since I first saw you
and talked to you that wonderful night on Stickam. But you were so hung up on your ex
I just admired you from afar in my heart, but still became the best of friends with you.
Small crush and all.
I remember back in the day, when you were with your ex and I was in love with someone else (although i still liked you) and we would call each other late at night, crying. Either you or me. Calling and crying about the people we were in love with but we found comfort in each other's voice and calmed each other down until the other passed out. I miss those days.
But those days don't even matter anymore, cause now, your mine and I am yours. And it's amazing cause YOU are the one that I've always been after. I've always had hope and never lost it. I mean I would forget about it, but it was always there because I would see you everyday and that very attractive face of yours.
I remember I was always jealous of your ex. I still kinda am and feel so awkward when we hang out with her.
I just sit there and think and wonder if you will ever love me as much as you loved her. I will always wonder that. No matter how long down the road. I try and not do anything or find anything that will remind you of her or bring her up. I just feel awkward when you talk about her. But just so you know, I won't hurt you like she did.
I'm just soo happy that I finally have you. See good things do come to those who wait. And I've waited for you for a long time. And I'm counting down the seconds until I get to kiss you again.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)